We aren’t in charge of what our memories choose to bring up and when. Sometimes, it can feel like our memory has a mind and emotions of its own. And if that’s true, our memories often love the people we’ve lost. 21. “Until I take my final breath, you will live in my heart.”

When London schoolteacher Ruth learns that her daughter, Eleanor, is pregnant, the two are sharing a meager Christmas dinner on a park bench. Eleanor is years into debilitating addiction, living on and off the streets with her baby's father, Ben, but Ruth pushes past Eleanor's resistance to offer help when Lily is born—holding vigil as the newborn goes through withdrawal in the hospital, taking control of the baptism as Eleanor and Ben keep wandering off, regularly stopping by their apartment to make sure they’re eating. When Ruth finds an unresponsive person in Eleanor’s apartment—ostensibly an overdose—she flees with Lily, anticipating a fight for custody that never comes. The years pass swiftly, almost perfunctorily, as Lily grows into a kind, strong-willed, and precocious child, “someone who knows life is a serious business, perhaps a few years before she might,” as Ruth's friend describes her. The pacing matches Ruth’s own matter-of-factness: Her outsize shame leaves little berth for wallowing, and her self-deprecating wit resists maudlin sentimentality. (The greatest source of comic relief comes from Jean Reynolds, Ruth’s co-worker, whose brashness and loyalty make her impossible not to love.) Through intimate first-person narration, Ruth balances the pain of losing a daughter against the hope of a second chance. Her relationship with Lily brings a cautious joy. Ruth can’t look at the girl without seeing the trail of maternal pain that originated with her own mother, who drank disinfectant after Ruth’s father left, and led to Lily’s miraculous birth. Love can go awry—see the double meaning of the title, which Lily discovers on a tombstone: “It kind of sounds like the person tried to be loving but…the aim was wrong”—but can that misdirection be righted? Though Lily isn’t immune from trauma—this is clear when her perspective abruptly takes over in the final third of the book—she is propped up by the strength of Ruth’s devotion. i have truly never made a greater fool of myself than when laughing and crying in equal measure, in public places, while reading this book. Ruth’s daughter Eleanor is a drug addict. When she falls pregnant and is unable to care for her child Ruth steps in. Her granddaughter Lily somewhat fills the hole that Eleanor’s absence has left. Nobody likes saying goodbye, especially when it’s a final goodbye. So a quote like this one by Gandhi can be a perfect option for a headstone epitaph. 23. “Too well loved to ever be forgotten.” Boyt's novel is compelling-and invites our compassion for those who may not always earn it, but still deserve itRuth, Eleanor and Lily are the three main characters in this short, quiet and powerful book. Ruth is Eleanor’s mother and Eleanor suffers from drug addiction and gives birth to Lily. Because Ruth knows that Eleanor is in no way equipped for the role of motherhood, at first she steps in to help. After it becomes apparent that Lily could be in danger, she takes on the role of parenting Lily herself. I can’t tell you how sad I was to learn of ______’s passing. Sending my sympathy and thoughts to you as well as remembering _____’s life and all When someone you love dies, you will traditionally engrave a headstone, grave marker, cremation urn, or memorial plaque with their name, dates, and a brief inscription. These In Loving Memory quotes are brief and to the point. This makes them ideal for an inscription or epitaph.

What we once have enjoyed we can never lose. All that we love deeply becomes part of us. – Helen Keller These in loving memory sayings are written specifically for the inscription. That could be on a headstone, a memorial plaque, urn or something else entirely. They are short and simple whilst conveying that loving message – perfect for inscriptions. This simple epitaph is an option if you want to speak to the headstone’s reader rather than directly to the departed. 19. “You touched my heart. You will live on in my dreams.”

Media Reviews

Missing You: 22 Honest Quotes About Grief– Pithy quotes that help describe the ups and downs of the grieving process.